Gli effetti della rabbia

Tutto nasce dalla necessità di non tenersi tutto dentro e di esprimere la rabbia. Poca attenzione viene posta sulla necessità di esprimere la collera in modo appropriato.

Amici, partner e familiari vivono in un continuo stato d’ansia. Non si sa mai che cosa può scatenare la crisi di rabbia. Così finiscono per soppesare ogni parola che dicono. Anche una battuta innocente o un commento di troppo possono scatenare una reazione aggressiva. Il clima diventa teso. Si cerca di tenere buona la persona irascibile. Si evita il confronto e magari nascondendo delle cose per non farla arrabbiare.

Anche se si fa la pace, le brutte parole dette durante i litigi rimangono dentro, lasciando cicatrici difficili da rimarginare. Il rischio è che se gli episodi di rabbia si ripetono, il partner o l’amico della persona iraconda finisca per non fidarsi più e decida di interrompere la relazione o l’amicizia.

Chi tende ad esplodere durante un litigio con le persone care deve diventare consapevole delle conseguenze negative del suo atteggiamento. Le scuse non cancellano le offese fatte nel momento di rabbia: le cicatrici rimangono. Una volta presa coscienza della distruttività del proprio comportamento, bisogna cercare di capire quali pensieri ed emozioni possono innescare la crisi di rabbia.

E’ importante analizzare l’episodio che ci fatto infuriare. Questo fatto ci ha fatto arrabbiare perchè l’abbiamo vissuto come un segnale di disinteresse? l’abbiamo vissuto come una mancanza di rispetto? Oppure abbiamo pensato che ci stesse tradendo?

Esiste qualche spiegazione alternativa a queste? Spesso basta imparare a leggere le situazioni in modo diverso per imparare a gestire la collera.

Ogni soggetto con problemi di rabbia probabilmente sperimenta situazioni in cui la rabbia è una risposta adeguata ed appropriata.

Un piccolo consiglio: metti su carta tutta la vicenda, per poterla rileggere dall’esterno, in questo modo ridimensionerai l’accaduto e capirai che non sono quegli episodi a crearti rabbia.

Dobbiamo imparare a rallegrarci di più, a ridipingere la vita di nuovi colori, e imparare ad apprezzarci di più; così facendo le cose andranno certamente molto meglio per tutti. Non si tratta di semplicistico ottimismo, ma di liberarsi dal male del quale e’ possibile liberarsi di sicuro: quello che dipende da noi stessi.

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